I like lists. They allow you to work out all the things you need to do throughout the day.
The adrenaline rush of crossing off a job well done.
The panic of adding another task to your list
The dark foreboding sense of woe when you see your list is getting bigger and not smaller.
In case anyone is unfamiliar with the concept of lists, I have made a list of the most famous lists:
To Do List
Santa's List
Shopping List
Guest List
ShortList
Listorious
Brahms and List
Bucket List
Below I have compiled a list of popular work avoidance techniques.
- Visiting the toilet - often when you only have no real urge to go.
- Decorate your cube / pod - often with stupid emails, funny pictures and meaningless certificates.
- Play miniature musical instruments on desk - most offices have at least one finger drum kit, or mini ukulele.
- Online shopping - It's like normal shopping, but can be done at your desk. The best price can easily be found, but what turns up is often a lottery.
- Complain about the music being played in the office. If you are feeling adventurous, go and change it and then wait for the volley of abuse from colleagues.
- Compile a list of industry buzzwords, and promise to yourself to never use them.
- Forward 'those funny emails' to friends.
- Sudoku / crossword - keep your mind sharp whilst switching off from work for 5 mins.
- Go to the shop - you might not be hungry, but you'll get some fresh air.
- Office sports - basketball, cricket, football - often played out of office hours.
- Building a group of online friends (rather than communicate with real people in the office). Just tweet it.
- Hone your artistic skills by becoming a doodle master.
- Play with desk toys - corporate merchandise, thinking putty, Rolodex, magnets, and whatever else you can get your hands on.
Hell, I might even make this into a feature. Writing lists is quicker than writing thought provoking and eloquent prose. I'll add the idea to my To Do List.