Tuesday, 23 November 2010

Mood music

Out of Office AutoReply: Thank you for your email. ES will be out of the office today observing the commuting masses. Please check back later for office based observations, or alternatively read on if you ever listen to the noise they call ‘music’.

That’s right, ES is going to be taking a look at the ear-wear, and aural consumption of those stuck in the rat race.

Apple headphones – how to look like a generic twit
and experience terrible sound quality in one easy move.
Available from the Apple Store for just £25 + shipping.

You see a lot of types on their way toward the daily grind. Here are just a few.

Types of Listeners:

Foam rest on headphones: Worn down, Macintosh adorned sad businessmen listening to the calming tones of classical music. Likely to have a discman hidden inside their jacket where the headphones are connected to. Favourite song – Pacobell’s Canon by J.S. Bach.

Around the neck earphones (right) – gym pumpers. Listen to dance music to get the adrenaline going when you most need it, on a pack underground carriage. Likely to own iPod shuffles, because they only need 30 minutes of music. That’s enough to concentrate on yeah? Favourite song – Bonkers by Calvin Harris

In ear phones – A group that is harder to categorise. A slightly more discerning listener, they might partake in slightly less humdrum tunes but have a penchant for soft rock.. Favourite song – The Scientist by Coldplay

Apple lovers – Anal about organising the track names and artist library on their 16GB iPod touch. Have all kinds of pouches, pockets, cradles and gadgets for their beloved MP3 device. Smugly nodding in approval to other wearers of white headphones. Favourite song – America by Razorlight

Cans – Usually pretty cool cats. They are either teenage skaters, or serious sound quality fans. Favourite song – F*** you by Cee-Lo Green or Strange and Beautiful by Aqualung.

Ultimately, the commuters face a dilemma – We all need to listen to music to nullify the horrendous commute but it is difficult to commit to listening to the challenging and interesting music I’m sure all executives possess in their personal media libraries. You end up revisiting the same tried and trusted, tepid wishy washy calming tunes on your train only to go into the office and listen to the same thing whilst working. Executives are becoming addicted to fast-food music. Junk music. Easy to please and mindless, the aural equivalent of Two and a Half Men.

But does one really want to listen Black Metal or Gangster Rap and end up as angry as this chap?

Then again maybe he was forced to listen to James Blunt’s new album and a Scouting for Girls marathon by Mrs Office Rage on the way to work.